“My life used to be full of everything. Now if you aren’t with me I haven’t a thing in the world.”
- Earnest Hemingway
The past several days have been some of the best of my life. Dreamlike, ethereal, and filled with a joy that can only be expressed through tawdry smiles and girlish giggling.
Nearly one year ago to the date, I turned down the love that was offered to me only to walk away wondering if I had made a foolish mistake. Less than two weeks later, I realized that my best friend, who had accepted my refusal with such grace and kindness, was truly so much more. And everything changed.
Last Thursday, this gentleman - my gentleman, and I trekked up a mountain in search of apples. We soon found ourselves looking over a valley of gold and crimson treetops. It was at that moment that my heart leapt with a combination of both incredible joy and anxiousness as I watched him shrink down on one knee and ask me to be his wife. Though I could scarcely make sense of what he was saying, with teary eyes and a shaking hand I let him slip a promise onto my finger. A dazzling, sparkly promise to be his now and always.
I have known, or at least hoped, that I would be writing this very post for so many months and now that I sit here, words seem so empty. Describing the most incredible day of your life is a formidable task, especially when I cannot hide my emotions behind a veil of butter or caramel.
There were many months of trepidation before I finally allowed my tight grip upon my perfectly planned future to be loosened. But at last I realized that the most wonderful of imagined futures can so easily distract and inhibit us from seeing the incredible happiness that sits next to us each Tuesday night. Slowly and begrudgingly, I looked to the only one who could possibly write a better future for me than I had written for myself. I’m so thankful that Someone, so much greater than I, loved me enough to ruin my plans.
photo by Matthew Dejesus
I’ll be back with more wonderfully fattening recipes soon but right now I have a ring to ogle.